It's Too Serious to be Called Domestic Violence

Can we please stop calling assault by one's spouse/partner/boyfriend, domestic violence? We tend to create labels that actually diminish in our minds the seriousness of the crime. It's personal. It's between a couple. Somehow, it's not as important. And before anyone sends me hate mail, women are as capable as men when initiating an assault. It's just that when women defend themselves, the justice system seems biased in favor of the guy. Just look at the case in Florida where Marissa Alexander received a 20 year sentence for firing a warning shot when she felt threatened by her abusive husband. They won't even let her out to prepare for her new trial. So, I'm going to have a particular slant here, if only as my own perspective.

According to news reports, George Zimmerman was just arrested a short time ago for domestic violence. I have no idea what happened between Mr. Zimmerman and his girlfriend. But I can tell you about one such time between my parents. One night, my father slapped my mother so hard across the face for standing up to him that it echoed throughout the house. I watched in horror. I was eight. My father was a dangerous man. He had weapons in the house and we knew to be careful around him. But she was tired of being used and said so. He was up off the couch and on her in an instant. He left her swollen and bruised, teeth loosened. Then there was the requisite apology. She didn't accept. Ever.

These days, that's called domestic violence. Back then, it wasn't called anything. Seems minor enough considering what some experience. But if it had been another guy, it would have been assault. In my mother's case, he never struck her again. Instead, he focused the abuse on me. But then, that was part of the so-called domestic violence I lived with growing up. And he never went to jail. Life was always on his terms. Even now that he's dead. Abusers have that effect.

Domestic violence is rarely only about violence between a couple. It's affects everyone in the house as well as anyone who is aware of it. It's an act of terror and terror becomes the norm, whether the act of terror is physical or psychological. I've known women who believe the physical abuse was a cake-walk compared to the endless psychological torture they endured. I understand that view and agree with it. As children, we have to figure out a way through all of it and become adults, leaving that baggage behind. Guess what. You don't. It affects everything.

Hearing about Zimmerman's arrest for domestic violence earlier today, made my stomach turn. He should be in prison for killing precious Trayvon.  Calling this domestic violence, especially in the case of repeat offenders, just doesn't cut it. Assault is serious, even more so when it's by someone who has convinced you he's worthy of your trust.

It's been the good ol' boys club long enough. It's not open season on women and children. We're not targets for your aggression. We're the people you're supposed to love. Otherwise..go away. And for the love of God, let Marissa Alexander go home to her children.

There are no words adequate...

Oh my God. Where do I even start? First of all, I didn't watch this trial. Instead I read accounts. I couldn't watch because I had a bad feeling from the start about it. When I heard the judge had included manslaughter in the jury instructions, I knew then that this might not go well. 

George Zimmerman got away with murdering Trayvon Martin. The jurors were women. Were they mothers? This baby boy could have been anything he wanted to be. The defense attorneys made Trayvon appear as if he was the murderer. That somehow, he tried to kill Zimmerman with the sidewalk. The sidewalk was his weapon. How could they say this in front of Trayvon's parents? Did they really need to make that boy into a criminal when he wasn't? 

I read that a woman got twenty years for shooting a gun into the air to keep her abusive husband from attacking her. Same judge in both cases apparently. When a woman who is a victim of domestic violence can shoot a gun in the air - not even at her stupid husband - and then get twenty years for only trying to save her own life, and George Zimmerman can go free, who are we? 

Florida's stand your ground law is disgusting. This idiot stalked this child. He was told to stay in his vehicle. He ignored that because he was arrogant. He got out and killed Trayvon. He ended a life that had so much promise. He destroyed two parents who loved their boy more than life itself. Trayvon did nothing wrong. He was only walking home. He is not the guilty one here. Zimmerman is. Except that he's not. The jury has spoken. They returned a verdict of not guilty. So I guess it's still open season on our children, particularly if they have brown skin.

I read that the NRA is involved in the enactment of these stand your ground laws. Doesn't surprise me. Listening to Joy Reid on MSNBC, it appears that Florida may not repeal this law because everyone seems to like it. I hope she's wrong about that. I would hope that Floridians would reconsider and repeal it, because obviously, it's not so clear cut. Except the jurors evidently thought that it was. Some pundits are saying the the prosecution didn't prove their case. Maybe that's true. If so, shame on them. Did they even try? Sure seems like the consensus of opinion is that the prosecution didn't explain what happened well and really didn't rise to the occasion until their final summation. They failed Trayvon, his family, and the rest of us. Simple as that.

Why are we so afraid of enacting gun control laws? Doing so doesn't violate the 2nd amendment. Too many children have died in the last year alone. How can we continue to allow laws to exist that result in the murder of our children? Does only a guy with a gun have rights? Because that's what it looks like to me. And now Zimmerman can carry that gun around any time he wants. 

Stand your ground laws are too much of a free-for-all and are too subjective to exist. Zimmerman gets to go home tonight. Trayvon is dead. I don't know how anyone can feel good about this one. The system is broken. For Trayvon's parents, the pain will be never ending because this did NOT need to happen.