Friday, January 24, 2014

Well now, isn't that convenient?

There's a movement afoot that requires women to be subservient to their husbands. Yeah, like that's going to happen. I'm so glad I raised my two boys to respect women and view them as equals. I can't imagine either of them ever behaving this way toward their wives. If they did, they'd have to face me, and that won't end well.

Yes, it's that important. Shared responsibility is what we modeled for our boys. Subservience was anathema. I knew women who lived that way and I didn't understand it then and I surely don't understand it now. It's one thing to defer to someone who knows more than you about something. It's another to do so simply because of gender and family position. The other thing we did was to respect their views. Ultimately, we made the final decisions, but they had a voice in their lives. Of course, that's not how we were raised. We both grew up in the "be seen and not heard" era of child rearing. Having experienced patriarchy that was abusive, we made the choice to break that cycle. My husband has never viewed women as less than, so he naturally set a positive example for the boys.

Patriarchy breeds abuse. Women and children lose. Every time. The feminist movement has tried to suggest a more balanced approach to relationships, but apparently it fell on some pretty deaf ears, because we're seeing the effects of this attitude everywhere. Conservative governors are signing into law policies that not only promote inequality, but are also found later to be unconstitutional in some cases. It's evident in committee hearings on women's issues when no women are at the table testifying. Apparently Congressional committees believe only old, white men have the answers when women's issues come up. It's governmental patriarchy at its most disgusting.

The Mayor of Hoboken, New Jersey, and her staff, are talking to the feds right now about a conversation she had with the Lt. Governor of her state. The nasty comments from other political officials that ensued were demeaning..referring to her as the lady mayor, and questioning her motivations. She's a Democrat, so evidently it's open season on her gender instead of on what she's saying. Most of the comments I heard indicated that no one seemed to even know her. How do they not know the Mayor of Hoboken? It's not like it's some out of the way little town. 

It's bad enough when we have men in our lives that oppress and abuse us, but when it gets codified into law, we have no redress save the courts, and they're a mess. A woman defends herself against a violent husband she had a restraining order on, and she gets 20 years. She's out on bail now after already serving time and nearly went back to jail for going shopping after receiving permission to do so. They've calmed down, but what else are they going to do to her? How much dignity is she supposed to lose for defending herself?

Abortion is a constitutional right, but you'd never know it in some states. Conservative governors again sign into law bills that are only going to ultimately be overturned in some higher court. Of course we have no idea what SCOTUS will do about all of it, and given the conservative activist mentality on the Court today, we may be in for some real trouble on abortion rights. Or they may just surprise us and simply do their jobs and interpret existing law. It didn't happen with the Citizen's United decision, so many of us are worried.

This week, Mike Huckabee made a ridiculous comment about women's libidos.This, from a former pastor. He essentially believes that we're all Democrats so that someone called Uncle Sugar will support us while our libidos run amok. He needs to get his mind out of the gutter and remember God. Others in the last election cycle had idiotic things to say about rape and pregnancy that does result no matter what delusions are rattling around their empty heads. Why don't they all come out and say what they're thinking: women are sluts. Sluts because we dare to question. Sluts because we dare to say no. Sluts because we dare to believe that we can be someone. Sluts because we want to equal pay. Sluts because we dare to decide WHEN we have children. Sluts because we want respect. Sluts because we dare to want more than you will give us. This is why you cannot be in control. You can't handle the responsibility. 

I've known some pretty intelligent men in my life, but I've also known real idiots. Same is true for women I've known. We need to respect individual differences and not claim ownership on others. Women and children aren't objects for your amusement. We're here and we matter. We move forward in life together; otherwise, we go nowhere. You have to stop being afraid of that fact.

And blessings to my husband and sons who already understand this..

No comments:

Post a Comment