On the day before Mother's Day..

I'm always uncomfortable around this time of the year. My mother used to say Mother's Day was "just another day". I would cringe because I knew it was more about her behavior as my mother than mine as her daughter. I always bought her a present and tried to make her happy. Unfortunately, I was trying to connect with someone who found nurturing challenging. Even when my parents divorced, she wasn't happy on that day. She died in 1996. Her birthday was two days ago. Had she lived, she would have turned 84. 

When the boys were young, we made a  big deal out of Mother's Day and Father's Day. Their Dad would take them to the store and buy flowers to plant on Mother's Day and we'd have a nice lunch or dinner. Father's Day was typically a barbeque or something. We never had the money to go anywhere, so we celebrated at home. Just being together as a family seemed enough. Our birth families were so dysfunctional that I suppose we tried to create a family of our own...without any of the drama we both grew up with.

But then college happened and everything changed. And now I find myself, the day before Mother's Day, hearing my mother's voice echoing in my heart. It's just another day. Because that's what it feels like. A mountain range separates us now, but the road goes both ways. The effort should as well.

The last year has been one of total transition for us. We received an eviction notice from our landlord at the commercial space we were renting after complaining to the city that the guy in back was poisoning us with styrene fumes (which is against city code as well as against all decency). After almost 14 years in business, we had to close because we couldn't financially survive the move. Our business was seasonal and we typically had to make 5 months of income last for 12 and we were coming out of winter on the previous year's money, so there was no time to move and bank what we needed for the following winter. Signing a year lease with someone didn't seem responsible, so we reluctantly closed our business and retired..about five years sooner than we intended to. By the time Mother's Day arrived, we were completely out of there and back home. We didn't celebrate that day..the loss was just too staggering.

Although we've certainly accepted what's happened, and are actually much happier than we were while in that business, it's definitely been a transition for us. It would have been nice to have our boys close by, but it is what it is. Kids grow up and move away. They're both busy in their lives and both have new jobs which is very cool, and we couldn't be more proud of them. And the last thing they need to worry about is their parents. But then Mother's Day arrives, followed by Father's Day and when we don't see them, feelings of loss abound. 

Here's the thing that kids need to know when they become adults. Your parents still need you in their lives. Yes, it's different when you're an adult. It's not like you end your relationship with your parents when you become adults. You begin a new one. One of reciprocity. And then, when we become old and decrepit, it becomes more one-sided again..with you guys in the driver's seat. It's the circle of life. It's how it's supposed to work.

For women, life is one continuing transition, from childhood through adulthood. In Wicca, it's represented by the Triple Goddess, or Maiden, Mother and Crone. It's a confusing process, for sure. We're conflicted as to our roles and how they play out. Society doesn't help by trying to oppress and judge us at every turn. When we reach our Crone years, as I have, we see more clearly the circle of life played out in front of us. We have become wise women. How can we not be after living through all that we have? We know that family is the nucleus of everything, and connection is vital. 

In truth, Mother's Day should celebrate the nurturer in us all, and offer an opportunity to extend love and gratitude to everyone in our lives. That's our purpose here, particularly now as the old era is giving way to the new. The Divine Feminine exists in everyone. Compassion will replace oppression as we go forward together in oneness. Celebrating Mother's Day as well as Father's Day next month is another way to express to those who nurture us along in life that we love and appreciate them. And what's better than that?

~Blessed Be

Creating altars..

Altars are fun to create. I try to create one daily to study correspondences for each day of the week. They can center around Sabbats and Esbats as well. Colors, crystals, Tarot, Runes, incense, herbs, tools, and deities are among the correspondences to consider. Elements and moon phase are also important when creating an altar. They can be simple or elaborate. I tend to get carried away with different crystals because I love them so much.

Since today is Sunday, here is today's altar:

The colors for Sunday are gold and orange, I used two of each color for the chime candles. Gold also represents the metal correspondence. Sunday is represented by the Fire Element, so I used red stones, carnelian and red jaspar, to represent Fire. I love spheres, so I used several, with the white moonstone sphere in the center of the pentacle altar tile representing purity and the Akasha Element. 

I included fresh juniper in the cauldron to represent Sunday's herb. Yellow daffodils and the Sun Witch Rune represent the Sun. The selenite wand represents today's magickal tool, as well as the Queen of Wands Tarot card. Strength, The Emperor and The Sun are also included. 

As the moon is waxing crescent, magicks of increase and resolve are represented by both the Sun (success/progress) and Two Rings (love, relationships) Witch Runes. Additionally, I've included five Runes. Thurisaz, Kenaz and Nauthiz represent the Fire Element along with magicks of protection, positive change and new beginnings. Sowilo represents the Air Element and influences magicks of strength, self-confidence, spiritual direction. Inguz (or Ingwaz) finishes the balance by representing both Earth and Water Elements. Strength, success are its magickal influences. 

I love dragons, and I included them as today's mythological being. Myrrh essential oil is simmering above one dragon as today's perfume in lieu of incense. A small bowl of red salt represents both Earth and Fire Elements. Lastly, if you look closely, I inscribed a bindrune representing today's Runes on the white candle holders. Bindrunes are really cool to make by combining runes together..sort of like reducing numbers to their lowest common denominator. They represent the blending of today's magickal influences using my favorite divination tool. I love Runes..whether they be Futhark, Witch or anything else. Symbols, numbers..they all have meaning and frequency, so I always include them.

We're all part of the same God/dess energy, whether in human form or otherwise. In my view, the altar represents balance and harmony, in ourselves and in the world around us. Beginning each day by creating one is a wonderful reminder and helps my focus for the remainder of the day. And I always learn something. 

~ Blessed Be! ✵☽✺☾✵

Bind Runes and Witch Names

Words have power, so it follows that names do as well. There exists such a thing in Wicca known as a witch name. It's used during rituals and is personal and meaningful. Some Wiccans have more than one name. One is reserved for inner work and the other is reserved for outer work. In other words, one is private and one is public. Numerology is involved in its selection, as is whatever dieties, animals, crystals, elements, etc. one might be drawn to. Witch names can be revealed during initiation, or if you're Solitary like me, you create your own. Some reveal their names, some don't. I happen to be one that doesn't. But I do love rune divination and one of the cool things to do with it is to create a bind rune of your name. So, I thought I would do that with my witch name. It ended up being prescient to say the least.

Bind runes are symbols you essentially bind together from whatever runes you happen to be using. I approach it in the same manner as reducing numbers. I find the commonalities and go from there, trying to create the smallest version of the bind rune possible. Balance is encouraged without being redundant. Writing out my witch name brought forth the following runes:

• Tiwaz - The god, Tyr - justice, balance, self-sacrifice, rational thinking - represents fundamental cosmic law as true reality and our alignment to that reality.
• Wunjo - Joy - understanding, community, harmony, leadership, connectedness - indicates a concern for others and their well-being, and recognizes that feeling joy is our strongest desire.
• Isa - Ice - stillness, self-preservation, focus, ego-awareness - expresses individuality, yet superficially, reflects illusion.
• Laguz - Water - unconscious, psychic power, oneness of all, imagination, dreams, collective consciousness - water symbolizes life as it flows along, our real foundation that exists outside the body, also involves Karma or Wyrd as actions have consequences.
• Othala - Homeland - inheritance, oneness, spiritual awareness and power, paradise - separation fades away leaving only oneness and unity as we accept responsibility for our home and for each other.
• Mannaz - Humankind - intelligence, thought, mind, service to others, incorporation of the divine into the everyday - how we perceive the world has consequences, so the emphasis is on harmony and community and what kind of world we, as co-creators with Source, create. Responsible behavior stemming from responsible thought.
• Nauthiz - Need - necessity, conflict, effort, consequences of behavior, doing whatever needs doing - the focus here is on what we actually need for survival and not neglecting our most basic needs. Recognizes the difference between survival needs and other desires.

Your witch name should reflect who you are and what matters to you. As an empath, I experience the energetic connection between myself and others. I not only believe we are all one, I know we are. I experience it. Our collective attention is here on this Earth, in this universe, to learn how to relate to each other in harmony and unity. Justice, self-sacrifice, community are all part of that process.

Underlying everything is Laguz, which tells us that our real existence is outside the body, and that everything we do here has consequences. This is a particularly important truth to an empath. We're aware of the collective consciousness that unites us all and that we have a responsibility to embrace the principles of Tiwaz including balance, justice and aligning with fundamental cosmic law while here in this life.

We have our basic human needs that Nauthiz refers to. But anything else is a choice, and we incorporate Mannaz to bring the divine into our everyday lives so that we behave responsibly toward each other. A sense of community results in joy, or Wunjo, which is our strongest desire.

The duality we explore in this life includes expressions of individuality which are not necessarily conducive to oneness and Isa tells us to be aware of the superficiality of the ego and to not let it deter us from embracing all as one. Oneness is preferable to self-preservation and sometimes this takes focus and a stillness so that we can see reality over the illusion.

Othala, the final rune, reinforces our reality of oneness and shows us that as separation fades away, our essential reality becomes all that is. As above, so below.

Runes are so fascinating. Using them offers clarity and perspective in our daily lives. I had no idea when I chose my name that it would contain all of this. I never thought of it in terms of runic divination. Both my date of birth and my birth name reduce down to 9. It also reflects two things I feel connected to. Looking at the runes and their meanings, it's everything I believe. I love synchronicity. Your witch name should reflect alignment with Source. I believe mine does..

~Blessed Be!