On being an empath in the new age

The end of the world is not upon us. Armageddon, the Apocalypse, it's all a metaphor for the end of an age..not the planet. We're not going to be physically taken up in any sort of Rapture. That's not what's happening. We've forgotten why we're here in the first place. We've forgotten who we actually are. We've forgotten that we are One with Source and with each other. We've forgotten that we can experience Heaven on Earth together. But none of that matters..the time is now for Oneness and no matter what roadblocks are put up, nothing is going to prevent that. 

The energy frequency of the Earth is increasing. We can no longer turn our backs on how we choose to live here. We must learn that living in harmony with and protecting our wonderful Gaia is critical. That means that collectively we have to deal with climate change, war, our ecosystem, and everything else that takes instead of gives. We don't have time for denial any longer. As the Earth's frequency increases, more and more Empaths, Indigo and Crystal children have been born to help usher in the new age where intuition and love will guide our relationships as well as our very existence. Angelic presence is felt by many who have also learned to ask for angelic guidance in their daily lives. The purpose of all of this is to help with that increase in frequency and to live in Oneness with others. 

The old paradigm is ending. It has no choice. It's nasty and hurtful and we watch as some of our lawmakers try to preserve the status quo by endless repeal attempts of our new healthcare law, voter suppression, the war on women and the middle class, and the disrespect and vitriol shown to our President. Try as they might to preserve the unworkable, we know that separation serves no one and will only lead to our destruction. But that's not going to happen. It's going to be difficult as the new age begins. It won't be comfortable. Those people who insist on separation will have an awful time because unity will ultimately prevail.Those who join in Oneness will have a better experience. So, if you've chosen separation, you might want to rethink that and be part of something amazing! Because it really is okay to care about people.

So, what on earth is an empath and how do we help bring about this inevitable change?

Empathy. We all have it to some degree. It's the ability to feel what others feel..to put ourselves in the shoes of someone else. Some of us, however, function as empaths. We feel everything. The fact is, all we are is energy...everything is, and our energetic bodies are actually more prominent than our physical bodies. We only have them as a temporary manifestation or projection so that we can experience life here in duality. Empath energy is faster than our physical energy so empaths must find a way to balance the two to stay present and to avoid illness. That increased energy flow is great when nothing interferes with it, but not everyone is comfortable being around us. We can do or say absolutely nothing, and still affect them. Somehow, they feel judged I guess, although that's not actually happening. Knowing isn't the same as judgment, but evidently it feels that way to others. It's like when you feel that someone can see right through you. Don't worry, it was just me and I'm not a threat at all. I see how you became the way you are..and all the childhood pain that brought you here. And I feel only compassion..

Although there are many similarities in empath expression, not everyone shares the same gifts or intensity. It's more of a continuum, I think. For me, it feels like my energetic or empathic body is more active and present than my physical body. And I see everything at once - the whole picture of something or someone. It may come as a simple awareness, or in great detail. Most say that they experience a general knowing about things that they have no personal knowledge of. Also, most share the gift of knowing when someone is lying. We're all clairsentient in some fashion, some more than others. Some are able to see non-corporeal entities and some aren't. Some are pre-cognitive, and some are telepathic. Or, if you're like me, a universal or implicate empath, you experience all of it in one form or another. It's weird, exhilarating, annoying, and amazing all at the same time. We're not insane, or crazy, although we might feel that way sometimes. I think we're just not completely "here". I think we're mostly "there". And that's why there are so many of us now helping to bring about a better life for all of us to experience. 

Empaths feel such a responsibility to get things right. We want to make sure people are safe and happy. We want to make sure the truth is both revealed and preserved. We're viewed as over-sensitive, over-reactive, over-you name it. Then we run around in an attempt to fix everyone's attitude toward us. It's as if we hand our feelings to others on a silver platter to do with as they will in an effort to preserve our place in their lives.

So why do we do this? We learn early on to respond in ways that mitigate whatever situation we're in. Unfortunately, truth isn't served this way, and eventually, it comes out anyhow. It also doesn't develop our empath abilities when we suppress our knowing to make our parents, teachers and friends more comfortable. But that's what we do to survive. In my case, it had the opposite effect. I seemed to become more aware which helped in negotiating my way through that family. 

I understand why some empaths choose a solitary life. It's easier than dealing with all the disparate energies around us. I'm about there, myself. Even traveling around the town where I live can be challenging. Volatility abounds out in the world and I pick up on it as I drive down the road. It's really freaky when we walk, which we do daily. Stores of any size can also be difficult, big box stores in particular. I don't always know where I begin and others leave off. And it's not always easy to center to figure it out when around volatile emotions. I was in a Costco recently and I had to cut the shopping trip short due to the frenetic energy inside. Energy was hitting me like gangbusters and I couldn't think clearly. I kept looking around to see if someone was about to attack me, but no one was even paying any attention to me. It was probably the worst experience I've ever had as an empath. The energy was so strong that I couldn't get control until after I left.

Living in the world, particularly now, requires engagement. It's critical that empaths understand how to engage in a way that not only helps others with their energy issues, but also prevents more vampiric energy from setting up house in your energy field. Most energy vampires don't realize what they're doing anyway, but some do and we really have to be vigilant with those people. They invade with intention and it's, well, icky. The others are usually just upset about something and choose empaths when needing to get something off their chest. And it doesn't seem to matter if they're complete strangers. Typically it happens to me in the check out line at the grocery store. I try to be supportive and respectful while keeping my frozen stuff frozen all at the same time. 

Many empaths grow up in abusive situations and feel as if we're born into the wrong family. Like we were switched at birth at the hospital or something. Except that we weren't. At some point, however, if we're going to be of help in this transition, we need to get a handle on what we're experiencing so that we can foster positive outcomes instead of wondering what the hell just happened.

So we have three options..we can engage, disengage, or observe. Observe, not absorb..that's the motto. That's the safest option, but it's not always realistic. It can make us seem aloof or indifferent to others, when nothing could be further from the truth. It's not uncommon for empaths to find work as healers of some type, so engagement for those folks is necessary. But are these three options mutually exclusive? I don't think so. Instead of observer, perhaps we can think of it is simply remaining non-judgmental. And maybe that's the key to the entire transition as we go forward.

Judgment involves the past and vain imaginings of the future. If we eliminate that and understand our essential Oneness, it becomes easier to maintain the higher frequency that's needed for the transition. Everyone will benefit from this. Even the people who resist. It just may take them a little longer to realize that. Eventually, even the most resistant will ultimately rest in the loving embrace of Family. And then they'll wonder what all the fuss was about. Staying in the Holy Instant, as A Course in Miracles suggests, is key, because there, we exist only in Love and extend that outward to everyone. And as we are all energy, all benefit from that loving extension.

But here's the cool part. As empaths, we don't have to fix any of the problems affecting the world unless we want to be a part of that. We only have to stay in the Holy Instant and be loving. That's it. Not everyone can be an activist for change. We simply need to keep our energy in balance and send out loving intention. Instead of reducing our energy frequency to match others, remain present, non-judgmental, and let others rise to ours. Trust me, it feels so much better to do that. I spent years engaging in other people's drama and all it got me was seriously ill, so it's far better the other way. Engagement doesn't always fix the drama, so deal with whatever you must, but stay as non-judgmental as possible in the process. Drama has only the meaning we give it. It has little power on its own. Staying firmly in the Holy Instant keeps us in the positive flow of creation. Anything less is fuel for more drama. It's better to remain part of the solution.

So, as we go forward into the new age, empaths should learn as much as possible about how they experience their time here. Less reaction, more observation, and knowing when to disengage will not only make our experience in this life less upsetting, but also make us more helpful to others. As the frequency rises, we'll have a much easier time of things and the oneness that we crave will prevail. And there's so much more support out there now for empaths. Lightworkers abound and are ready to help in any way possible. Empath forums exist to provide connection with other empaths to help as you discover more about your reality. We are living in exciting times. Let's embrace this transition together.

~ Blessed Be

Ostara Runecasting

Othala, Thurisaz, Ihwaz

Today is Ostara, the Spring Equinox, when day and night are of equal length. Wiccans as well as Pagans celebrate the first day of Spring as a time of new beginnings and rebirth. I thought I would honor Ostara by doing a runecasting. Typically, when I do a three rune casting, I'm looking at either the landscape of the coming week, or at Issue, Action and Outcome. Today, however, I'm going to look at Body, Mind and Spirit.

Othala, an Earth Element rune, represents our home, and could also indicate property or possessions. From the Body position, that would indicate our home on Earth. But are we a body with the goal of spirit, or are we spirit living in a body? Where do we actually begin? In my view, we are actually Spirit, part of the collective consciousness created by Source Energy, or God if you prefer. While a portion of our collective attention is here experiencing duality, we primarily exist in the Perfect Oneness of All That Is. And by that I mean Source Energy or God. Othala also represents a connection to our Higher Self. It is there that we should feel at our most grounded and secure. 

Thurisaz, a Fire Element rune, in the Mind position, involves protection, self discipline, tactical and prudent thinking. It also suggests awakening, and the new beginnings represented by Ostara. This projection of duality in which we find ourselves can be tricky to navigate when we forget who we really are. We become caught up in the ego's machinations that further separation. Clarity of thinking, and the positive change that can result from purposeful action, can keep us focused on the task at hand. The task, however, is not a burden as our only function here is forgiveness. We see past the drama of the world and remember that we are One. Thurisaz gives us the self discipline to remain focused on extending love and forgiveness instead of focusing on ego-based drama.  

Each situation then becomes an opportunity to live consciously, embracing each new situation free from fear. In the Spirit position, Ihwaz, a rune of all Elements: Earth, Fire, Air, Water, and Spirit, suggests that we are not victims of this world. Our connection to Source Energy assures this fact. As A Course In Miracles states: Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God." Representations of ego, therefore, are not real because they're not reflections of Source or God. Of course, we still experience these things here, but it's how we view them that matters. If we continue to engage with others in drama, the ego wins and we all lose. If, however, we engage with others as if each encounter is a holy one, then old negative energies clear away, leaving only love in their place. Uncomfortable behavior by others is only error..and error can be replace by truth.

We remember who we are, stay focused on extending love and forgiveness, and remain in the Perfect Oneness of All That Is. A wonderful way to begin anew! 

~ Blessed Be ~


NOTE: The above quotation if from A Course in Miracles. Foundation for Inner Peace.

Revealing ourselves..

“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.” ― Maya Angelou

I love Maya Angelou. And she's right. It would save so much drama and heartache if we would only pay attention to what people show us instead of what we want to see. Behavior can be telling, but should that be the only factor that we consider? It's the "who they are" part that's open to interpretation and for me, the most important factor involved. Because when we know that, everything becomes clear.

We can't change other people. But what we can do is change how we view them, and then, with any luck, respond more positively in difficult situations. We're a disparate group that, in reality, are One. We struggle in an effort to preserve our individuality, when we should drop resistance and embrace each other as the same. We can choose to see the drama where, as individuals, we are at odds with each other, or we can choose to see Oneness where none of the drama exists. Illusion versus Reality. If we know who we really are in truth, then the drama expressed is part of a painful illusion we've both chosen to experience.

The notion that what we see as life in this world is actually a projection of our collective mind can be daunting to consider let alone accept. It not only challenges current religious teaching on the subject, but also turns the idea of God creating this world on its head. But that's what A Course In Miracles does. We created this world by thinking we could be separate from God. It explains that our only real choice is to continue focusing on the projection, or awaken to the fact that we are still One. Hell or Heaven. It's not that we vanish from this world when we awaken to this..because we don't. We simply see things differently, choosing to see through a holy vision versus an ego vision. We look upon the world without judgment, staying removed from the drama that pulls us back into the illusion of individuality. Since our Minds are joined as One, as each of us begins to respond this way, all receive the blessing, or miracle as the Course says, whether or not they actively participate.

Each of us is responsible for our own reactions to negativity others may express. As unpleasant as the situation is, if we engage with others in a similar way, it keeps our focus on the projection instead of Reality. The question is, do we focus on illusion or Truth? If we know that we are actually part of the Oneness of God, and that what we see is a projection or dream, we should understand that our hostile brother is in pain, or his hostility wouldn't be possible. He's focusing on the illusion instead of Perfect Oneness where only Love exists. We should extend love and kindness, and if that's not possible at the moment, we need to stay in the present, in the now, and not react at all. It only keeps the expression of pain going in the other person. The situation ratchets up, and so does justification on all sides. If a problem truly exists, then it has to be viewed dispassionately so that a solution can be found. Staying present in the moment can create the space for that to happen. Negative emotion dissipates in the extension of love. And isn't that what people in pain really need?

We reveal ourselves in every moment we spend here. We offer opportunities to everyone to either engage in the drama of illusion or in the presence of Perfect Oneness. We can judge, or we can love. That's our only free will..our freedom to choose right-mindedness over ego-mindedness. When I first heard Maya Angelou's quotation above, I thought it meant that I should pay attention and not set myself up for heartache by engaging with people who clearly don't have my best interests at heart. Although I still think that's probably a good idea, it's less clear cut now. Instead of believing the behavior we see as the only factor involved, we can see the pain that exists behind the behavior. We can view this projection as a place where we practice forgiveness and love, or we can view it as a battlefield.

The question then becomes: what would happen if we each chose to step away from the battlefield?

Working through the Workbook

Now that I've read the entire text of A Course in Miracles, I've finally begun the accompanying workbook for students. It's divided into 365 lessons which I can do daily, or stay longer with some lessons if I need to. The lessons appear at first to be simplistic, but as I continue to work through them, their meaning is profound. The idea is to re-train our minds to see holiness instead of judgment. The Course begins with:

Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God. ACIM Preface p.x

The point is to embody that idea in our daily lives. It's the way to peace. It's the way to remembrance. It's the way to Oneness. The lessons illustrate that the world we see is a projection or illusion and that we give it all the meaning it has. It's really that simple. We can choose to see it through the prism of the ego, or we can choose to see it as either an expression of love or a call for love. We can see it with judgment, or see it as nothing at all. In the Oneness, this world doesn't exist. The workbook teaches us how to live in the world while remembering we're not of the world.

The world of illusion is filled with drama. We don't want to accept our role, much less our active participation, in that drama. But we must accept that responsibility or we'll never accomplish the task at hand. The first twenty-five lessons focus on understanding that not only do I give meaning to whatever I'm seeing, but also my thoughts have power, that they're not neutral. They have effect and keep the drama going. I can focus on thoughts of attack and judgment, believing that I am responding to what I see. But that's the whole point..I'm responding to what I see. Not someone else..me. No one forces me to process things the way I do. I do that. I can choose something else. Choosing to stay above the fray and not judge, frees me to love unconditionally. I'm only at lesson twenty-five. Still having trouble with the unconditional part at times. We can attempt to control the outcome of situations, but as long as we stay in the drama, that will never happen. It's only when we step away from it, and choose extending love over judgment that we choose to remember who we are as part of the Oneness that is God. That's the only thing that's real. The rest is a projection of our collective guilt over our perceived separation from God. It's not true..we're still part of that Oneness, existing here in our collective dream state. That ends when we all remember. The workbook furthers that goal.

Lesson 22 says that when we typically look upon the world, vengeance is what we project. We blame everyone for our so-called problems and feel justified in responding with attack. The drama is circular in nature and, therefore, self-reinforcing. It never ends unless we choose to step away and end it. In lesson 24, it suggests that nothing I do is in my best interest as long as I'm choosing judgment. It's in my best interest to see holiness and Oneness, not judgment and separation. And yet that's exactly what we all do. Our justification fosters more separation. Judgment gets us nowhere and never will.

Today's lesson, twenty-five, tells me that everything I encounter is for my best interest. It doesn't matter if it is an expression of love or a call for love, it gives me everything I need. These are opportunities to join with others in Oneness. They're a blessing. If I devote my time to expressions of ego, then I don't understand what my life is about. Remember that if only God is real, then this world of projection is meaningless. Focusing on or responding to meaningless projections instead of seeing them as love or a call for love, prevents my awakening.  If I extend love in whatever situation I find myself, then my awakening continues.

As the work continues, I'll be posting more.. It's going to be an interesting year..

Note: the above quotation is from A Course in Miracles. Foundation for Inner Peace. 2007

 

Thought creates form..

Thought creates form. That's easily understood when you hear a beautiful song or see a priceless painting. We understand that the songwriter or painter was inspired and from that inspiration arose a wonderful creation. Our efforts to live together as one don't always inspire wonderful creations. But they do offer us a classroom of sorts, with the ultimate goal of seeing holiness in everyone.

Choosing to see holiness instead of what others present to us feels odd at first, especially when the other person is behaving in a hurtful manner. We're used to justifying our own responses based upon the actions of others. How do we see past their projection and respond with love instead of judgment? For me, it helps to go into every moment with forgiving intention. Or I should say, it's my goal each time. I fail often. But when I don't, it's such an awesome feeling. To stay in the Holy Instant with people is amazing. After experiencing it even one time, I feel compelled to do that again. It's so much better than living in drama where few, if any, real solutions exist.

The Course teaches that what we see in others is either an expression of love or a call for it. When people are difficult, that's clearly a call for love, so why would we respond with judgment or attack? If that person were our child, we would naturally try to figure out what's going on before concluding anything. In reality, we should feel that way about everyone.

It's not about religion, or which religion is right. It's about our reality in the Oneness that is God. That doesn't require any religion at all. It just is. We just are. If we are One in God, then we are also One here in this illusory projection we call life. In other words, we're family. Always have been, always will be. We should remember that.

So, back to thought creating form. How we think about things matters. Divisive thinking gives rise to punitive laws that serve no one. It allows governments to abuse their people as we've seen, for example, in Syria. It allows lawmakers in this country to not only refuse to extend federal unemployment benefits to those in our family still struggling to find work, but to also shut down the government in an effort to prevent people from taking advantage of the Affordable Care Act. We've waited forever for affordable health insurance, and yet conservatives mistakenly believe this is a terrible thing to have. 

Evidence of separation is all around us. It's an illusion, because we can never be separate from each other. It's not possible. We are one. We can choose to see separation or we can choose to see the truth, but we cannot change what is. Look around the world and what do you see? Conflict is everywhere. We come up with endless reasons to be separate when the only way forward is together. We must stop putting people in their so-called proper place in life. It's never proper for them..only for us. And while we're at it, we must stop thinking in terms of us versus them. There is no them. There is only us. What affects you, affects me. Always.

So what form should our thoughts manifest? Oneness, of course. The love that comes from that transcends any petty conflict and drama we've chosen to create. Awakening to Oneness is our means of rejecting the separation we have chosen to see in this life, and instead, seeing only God in everyone. 

We change our minds and we change everything. Do we create a world where love is abundant, or do we keep creating division among us? My preference is love..

A Great Teacher has Returned Home..

Yesterday was a big deal for two reasons:

Ken Wapnick passed yesterday. He was there from the beginning of A Course in Miracles. He knew Helen Schucman and William Thetford. Helen received the revelation and Bill transcribed it. Ken and his wife Gloria introduced the Course to the world. Although I have never met any of them, by making the Course available, my life was changed forever.

The other thing that happened yesterday was I finally finished the text of A Course In Miracles. It only took thirty years or so. I would only get through half of it and then I'd become sidetracked by life. I could have finished it Thursday, but I decided to wait. I didn't have any real reason for that, and when it only took a few minutes yesterday to finish, I was irritated at myself for slacking off. I thought, well this is fitting. It was then that I discovered Dr. Wapnick had died. And then I knew why I waited. What better tribute to pay to someone than to study a message he so selflessly spent his life sharing with all.

I believe strongly in synchronicity. It reflects the oneness that defines us all. The Course presents oneness as our reality. The world as we see it now is simply an elaborate illusion that we relive again and again until we don't need to anymore. It's a dream that we believe is reality. The Son looked away from the Father only for an instant. It was over and done with as soon as it happened. That notion alone can be a bridge too far for many. And yes, it defines the "Son" a little differently. Instead of an individual, the Son is all of us. However, I'm one of those out of the box thinkers so I was not deterred by any of that. The world had always seemed surreal at best anyway, so it essentially clarified things for me. I didn't realize back then that I was an empath, but it didn't stop me from functioning as one. So the Course seemed a natural extension to how I already experienced the world. 

As the cliche goes, we're spirit having a human experience. We are misdirected Thought in various stages of awakening from the dream. As the veil lifts, we awaken to the understanding that we are indeed home where our Creator has never left us. Sin, according to the Course, is of the world and is an illusion of our own making. Instead, it's error, which can always be forgiven. No one is condemned to hell. We are presented with continual opportunities to forgive instead of attacking each other. It's our choice what we do while we're here. When our bodies stop functioning, we remain as we always have been..in oneness with each other and in oneness with the Creator. It's odd we don't seem to embrace that while our bodies exist. We can see evidence of that everywhere. But when we do, there will be no further need for the world. 

In the last chapter of the text, the Course exhorts us to "choose once again". It reminds us that in every encounter we have the opportunity to choose to see holiness instead of sin, heaven instead of hell. We have the opportunity to choose forgiveness over attack. We can, indeed, choose once again. And as we do, we stay in the oneness, the Holy Instant, where time doesn't exist and love is all there is.

In honor of Ken, here are the last four paragraphs of the text:

Let us be glad that we can walk the world, and find so many chances to perceive another situation where God's gift can once again be recognized as ours! And thus will all the vestiges of hell, the secret sins and hidden hates be gone. And all the loveliness which they concealed appear like lawns of Heaven to our sight, to lift us high above the thorny roads we travelled on before  the Christ appeared. Hear me, my brothers, hear and join with me. God has ordained I cannot call in vain, and in His certainty I rest content. For you will hear, and you will choose again. And in this choice is everyone made free.

I thank You, Father, for these holy ones who are my brothers as they are Your Sons. My faith in them is Yours. I am as sure that they will come to me as You are sure of what they are, and will forever be. They will accept the gift I offer them, because You gave it me on their behalf. And as I would but do Your holy Will, so will they choose. And I give thanks for them. Salvation's song will echo through the world with every choice they make. For we are one in purpose, and the end of hell is near.

In joyous welcome is my hand outstretched to every brother who would join with me in reaching past temptation, and who looks with fixed determination toward the light that shines beyond in perfect constancy. Give me my own, for they belong to You. And can You fail in what is but Your Will? I give You thanks for what my brothers are. And as each one elects to join with me, the song of thanks from earth to Heaven grows from tiny scattered threads of melody to one inclusive chorus from a world redeemed from hell, and giving thanks to You.

And now we say "Amen." for Christ has come to dwell in the abode You set for Him before time was, in calm eternity. The journey closes, ending at the place where it began. No trace of it remains. Not one illusion is accorded faith, and not one spot of darkness still remains to hide the face of Christ from anyone. Thy Will is done, complete and perfectly, and all creation recognizes You, and knows You as the only Source it has. Clear in Your likeness does the light shine forth from everything that lives and moves in You. For we have reached where all of us are one, and we are home, where You would have us be. T-VIII. v.9-12 pp 668-69

Excerpt from A Course in Miracles. Combined Volume. 3rd Edition. Foundation for Inner Peace. 2007 

 

 

The First Year in Review..

I started this blog one year ago today on the advice of my youngest son. He felt my Facebook page was too activist and I should have another, more appropriate place to express my views. I guess he didn't realize I could post everything I write here on my wall. In any event, I have to thank him because I really like my blog. I appreciate everyone who has read any of it. I named it Eternally Dazed and Confused because typically that's how I feel. I decided I would write about the things I care about..women's issues, the whole country is going down the crapper, medical cannabis, and things like that. Then came the more metaphysical stuff such as runecasting, The Course, and empath abilities. 

A year ago, I didn't know that four months later my business would end and our lives would be turned upside down. I also didn't know that ultimately, that would be a really great thing. I also would learn that I didn't have the friends I thought I had. That was far more difficult than losing the business. But it's always better to know the truth about things, and evidently their friendship was tied to our business and not to us. And that's okay. Things get confusing when your business is your life. And now that I'm happily unemployed, clarity has finally returned.

I've had time during this year to return to my study of A Course in Miracles. It's not that I stopped studying, I just didn't finish the text. So I, along with my husband, began the text again and I'm almost finished. He listened to the entire book on his IPod and is currently on his second time around. The Course is such a departure from how most people view themselves and the world around them, that it's a blessing that he has embraced it as I have. He might as well since he's been exposed to it for the last thirty years. It's nothing if not familiar.

Studying the Course has also helped me as an empath. Constant awareness of emotions surrounding me tends to leave me feeling drained. It would be nice if it were empowering, but it's not. The noise gets loud and I usually check out until it quiets down. From the Course, I realize that it's really a focus problem. I've always been too distracted by everything that goes on around me. It's sort of like going to a craft store. I have no idea where to start. Creative energy is everywhere and there's so much to look at! The only thing I can do is to start at one end and go through each aisle until I find what I came there for. Empaths are like kids in a candy store with energy. We absorb everything unless we shield ourselves from it. So over the last year, I have been learning how to shield myself more effectively. And that's been a lifesaver.

In July, my abuser died and his wife is now sending me the bills associated with his death. Although we've never met, she had decided that his ultimate victim should be responsible for everything. Nice lady. She apparently also tried to replace his name with her own on my brother's house, which he owned jointly with my brother. She also didn't tell us about a couple of related bank accounts, one of which, unbeknownst to me, I was an actual owner of, and the other we were both beneficiaries of. Unfortunately for her, however, when she alerted the bank of his death by cancelling our father's debit card, the bank contacted my brother to let him know the funds need dispersing. Having no idea what this was about, he contacted the wife and she went nuts.  Grandmaster Parker used to say something to the effect, "greed is the seed of destruction". He was right. It is. So the bills come. If they don't come directly from her, then I contact anyone I have to and explain the situation, and then threaten to sue them if they bother me again. Because after all, daughters who are molested by their fathers don't have to be responsible for the death bills. Wives are. Particularly in community property states. Which they lived in when he died. Women might want to think before marrying late in life. It's telling when daughters cut off contact with their fathers and no one will explain why.

All in all, even with the bumps in the road, the summer was awesome. I reconnected with my home, worked out in my greenhouse, did all the flood irrigation of our pasture, and I'm walking eight miles each day. Yes, eight. Four years ago, my RA had become so bad that I thought I would die. I was in what would become a year long flare. Half way through, I became a cannabis patient. January 2011 was the beginning of the end of my twelve year nightmare. I could barely walk during those years, making even going to the grocery store difficult. Excruciating pain 24/7 is exhausting, so to be able to walk eight miles a day is pretty cool. Unfortunately, Kenpo is another story. I have so much damage from the RA, that I find working out to be tricky, so that's going more slowly. The last thing I need to do is injure myself, but I've been a Black Belt for almost twenty-three years. And not being able to move like one for twelve of those years was devastating. Baby steps..

I hate platitudes, but the one about losing everything to find what you actually need is true. We all get so caught up in illusions that seem to drive our chaotic lives when we need to choose peace. We're only victims of our chaotic lives if we choose to be. We forget how much power we actually have to extend love and unity to others. Anything else doesn't deserve our attention at all..

Thanks for reading! Your comments are most welcome and so very appreciated!

Oneness and the Course..

I became a student of A Course in Miracles in the mid-eighties. I heard the name of the book and I knew it was real. Yes..I know..but empaths do that sort of thing. We just know. I have spent around thirty years of my life trying to complete it because it's required. I'd get through most of it, and then I'd become sidetracked by my ego and come back to it, sometimes years later. Once you know about it, you have to do it. No matter how long it takes. I drove my family nuts with all the "things only have the meaning you give them" comments. Although not a religion, it references Christian terms, but it's more than that. The Course redefined my understanding of God and myself in a way that I had never thought of before. Honestly, if everyone knew what the Course says, our view of religion would change completely. And it probably should given how people have used religion for their own nefarious purposes. Religion, in and of itself, is fine. It creates community and teaches people to be loving to each other. But as we all know, this can go awry and all kinds of destructive things can result. 

I've always been interested in the "how" of things. How is even more important to me than "why". So when it became clear to me from my study that oneness was more than just a spiritual concept, I was intrigued. And after you know that, just try and get mad at people. Go ahead..try to condemn them completely. Pretty soon, you start thinking about how they became so awful that they deserve your wrath in the first place. That gives way to, say it with me now, understanding. Anger gives way by then to forgiveness and pretty soon, not only can you not be mad at anyone, you actually find yourself becoming concerned about them instead of condemning them. How is that even possible when you felt so justified? Of course those who are immersed in their "me-ness" might have a problem with all of this, but separation, divisiveness, and disunity are at the root of the world's problems, so individuality be damned.

So back to the notion, we are one. What does that actually mean? I attended a lecture last May given by His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, where he affirmed this very premise. In my study of A Course in Miracles, I discovered that oneness actually exists on the metaphysical level. We are one, because we are one. We only look separate because we chose to be separate. The Sonship is actually all of us, as one. We are also one with the Holy Spirit, the Voice for the Creator, as well as with the Creator. We can choose to forgive (the Atonement) and return home, or delay that return by choosing the ego (body). We cannot choose both. It's either one or the other. We either choose oneness with the Creator (which is reality) or oneness with our ego (unreality). The Course says:

Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God.

What an amazing concept! If true, then this world is an illusion and apparently only necessary so that we can forgive ourselves for separating from the Creator in the first place. We accomplish this by forgiving others. Since we're all one anyway, by forgiving others, we forgive ourselves. This is the miracle the Course speaks of. It brings love to each of us and undoes fear. It acknowledges the worth of all. Miracles are thoughts so loving that they heal involuntarily, apart from our own direction. True healing we leave to the Holy Spirit. All we're asked to do is to remember that we are one and as such cannot judge anyone. If we are indeed one, then any judgment we make of others is judgment upon ourselves. 

We blame and attack each other for problems that, more often than not, arise from our own perceptions. We make this stuff up out of whole cloth, creating drama in an effort to dominate others. Instead of understanding this is all a script that was written long ago that we come back here time and again to relive, we view what's happening as real. Except that drama is often threatening. And as we know from the aforementioned quote, if the drama was real, nothing about it can be threatening. In other words, if the drama were from the Creator, then it would be real and all-encompassing. Instead, it's from our minds. We create the mess that doesn't actually exist and if we only turned away from it, we would be fine. We would remember that we're part of something that is so much greater than anything we can conceive of here in this existence. We exist in peace and love. We can exist that way here by viewing everyone and everything as holy and engage in the Holy Instant with everyone, free from judgment, and full of love.

And that's not always easy, and we're always looking to see if forgiveness "took". Unfortunately, that's also judgment, and considered to be an attack upon the very person we're forgiving..as well as ourselves (that whole oneness thing again). And really, is there a choice to be made at all? We tell ourselves that there is, but there isn't if we want to live in truth. Life here in corporeal existence is hard. We dodge minefields everywhere. If we actually believed that we were part of a greater spirit that is complete love and joy, wouldn't we focus on that? Somehow, we've decided the world of the ego is more interesting, so we focus our efforts on building that world, instead of turning back to the only world that really exists..Heaven. 

All that happened was misdirected thought. When everyone understands this, this world will no longer exist because it won't need to. Learning will have been accomplished and oneness will again be all that is.

NOTE: Quotations are from A Course in Miracles. Foundation for Inner Peace. 2007.
Contact them at PO Box 598, Mill Valley, CA 94942 or on the web at www.acim.org

Sunday/December Runecasting 12/1/13

Nawthiz (need), Tiwaz (cosmic law), and Berkano (life force)

"Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing real exists. Herein lies the peace of God." ACIM

Today's runecasting is interesting. It speaks to some things I've been thinking about lately. Nawthiz refers to need or necessity. What do we actually need to exist in this life? We fill our minds with illusions of what we need, but actually, we need none of those things. We invent a life that is filled with chaos and judgement and forget that we are spirit incarnated here for such a short time. Since our true nature is one of spirit, and not of the body, we evidently get distracted and create whatever mess we choose. But choice has nothing to do with need and that's where the conflict arises. Need is defined by the Creator, not by us.

Tiwaz refers to basic or fundamental universal law. These are the truths that are defined by the Creator, or Source Energy. They are the basis for our moral compass that some in this life find so challenging. Tiwaz speaks of balance and justice, and sacrifice for the common good. It challenges us to engage in "right thinking" and reflects a universal set of truths or laws that govern everyone..even when we don't cooperate. The action is, in effect, to remain true to the blueprint given us by the Creator.

Berkano, or life force, represents birth, rebirth, emergence and sanctuary. Although typically I would interpret this as a rebirth of sorts, in light of the Course, it feels more like an emergence into the sanctuary of the higher self. It's like a clearing away of the mist that has been a veil before our vision for so long.

Only the needs of spirit are real..remaining focused on universal truth, nothing else matters..and in remembrance we emerge peacefully into the light.


You Sister In Oneness,

~ Jan

Resting in peace..

Rest in peace is typically something we say when someone has passed. The reality of that phrase is something else. A Course in Miracles talks about staying in the moment, the Holy Instant, not allowing the past or the future to influence with judgement how we see our brother in that instant. We indeed enter a pure space where time falls away, in oneness with our brother.

In Chapter 20, the Course talks of entering the Ark. The Ark is a safe space where we enter with our brother, remaining in the Holy Instant, outside of time. There is no judgement there. It is a place where "Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing real exists. Herein lies the peace of God." ACIM

The Course teaches that we are essentially spirit having a human experience here. As long as we don't forget this (we usually forget this) then we're here, resting in peace all over the place, happy and loving to everyone. We embrace the truth that we are part of a collective consciousness, where each spirit is as essential to the whole as all the others. 

Our confusion happens when we see the world around us as real, when it is an illusion of our ego's making. We allow judgement to enter every situation, bringing the past into the present, thus controlling the future. Unfortunately, it's a dark place where the light that never leaves us is kept at bay. Or at least we think that's what we're doing. After all, we're confused here.

When we realize that everything here is error, we can forgive our brother and in doing so extend that gift to ourselves. The reality is, what one experiences, so does the rest. As spirit, we're connected to each other that way in spirit. The body is an illusion of our making and has no real meaning. We can use it for love, or we can use it for hate. It's a choice, except even that is an illusion..and only of the ego. In truth, we could no more hurt our brother in spirit because spirit doesn't not see error. When we turn away from error and remember we are actually spirit, the distinction becomes clear.

The awareness of our reality as spirit is actually a remembrance that some of us never lose when we are born into this existence. As an empath, I have never fully attached to my body which helped considerably when experiencing sexual abuse as a child. I was able to separate from my body and remain unaffected by what was happening. Surreal, I know.. And from my course work toward my degree in psychology, I'm fairly certain that I would have been locked up in a psych ward had I shared any of that with anyone back then. Because although my soul remained unaffected, my ego was destroyed. Without support it's difficult as a child to discern the difference. And I had no such support, so I was on my own to process all the crazy making behavior my family heaped upon me.

When I found the Course, it put words to what I had always known, making my empath reality understandable as well. I absorb energy if I don't protect myself. If I don't stay in the present in the moment, then I can take on all sorts of energy that is hurtful to me. Staying present is harder to do than it sounds. I feel a physical pull to chaotic energy. It's the ego's play time and if I'm not careful, I can lose focus on what's real and become the other person in a sense. Empaths are distracted by chaotic energy the way a small child is distracted in a toy store. We engage. Monumentally so, at times. I can even become physically ill as well. What helps me is to remember that when I feel that energy pulling from me, I'm actually leaving the safety of the present and using the past to judge whatever I'm experiencing at the time, creating a new present that is based in illusion. In other words, it's not real, and as we know..nothing real exists.

I learned from the Course that I don't have to participate in everything that's going on around me because none of it is real anyway. If it's not of the Source, then it's not real. It frees me to not see error in my husband, my kids, my friends, or my neighbors (even the guy with the gun, see August 14 post). I can release my abuser from that judgement. None of it was about me anyway. I can be mindful of energy and how it affects me without diving in head first, understanding that I give all of it the meaning it has for me. I can choose to see the holiness that is, ignoring the ego's attempts at diversion. That keeps me present. That keeps me in spirit..and resting in peace..

In Oneness 

~ Jan

Sunday's Runecasting.

As a student of A Course in Miracles, I relate my work with runes to the basic premise of the Course.. “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God”. A three rune spread works well for this purpose.

I felt moved to use an amethyst set of runes today instead of my usual apple wood set. Amethyst is a stone of protection and spirituality, fostering spiritual growth and a connection to the divine. Today, I pulled Fehu, Jera, and Dagaz. Typically, a three rune spread will involve Issue, Action and Outcome.

Fehu is represented by cattle, or the herd. It’s the first rune of the first Aett. It’s where we begin in life. We begin our corporeal existence as one of the herd. Fehu suggests that we become more independent with time. Time is the key word here which will have more meaning when I discuss the significance of Jera. Fehu also represents wealth, earned income, position, status. But as we know from the Course, these things are illusions created by the ego, using the past to judge, furthering the separation from each other and the Creator. In my view then, Fehu suggests that true wealth is spiritual in nature and cannot be threatened by the illusory nature of this world.

Jera is represented by time..in this case the Year. It suggests the universe is indifferent to what goes on here. Another way of saying this, is that the Creator makes no judgement. The Course teaches that judgement belongs to the Creator and not to us. That does not mean that the Creator sits around judging any of us..because She does not. Time is attached to the past and, therefore, judgement. Time is a linear construct, relevant only to this world. It doesn’t exist in spirit. It is of the ego; therefore, it is not real. Because as we know, “nothing unreal exists”. Fehu represents not only growth and development, but also erosion and decay...the essential impermanence of this corporeal existence.

Dagaz is represented by the light of Day. Transcending time, it suggests realization or enlightenment. One would think this is the result of a journey, and I suppose in one sense it is, except it’s a journey to what already is. It’s a shift in perspective, or perhaps a realization that perspective is judgement and not relevant at all. We live along the horizontal plane in this life, but as we realize what we actually are, miracles collapse time, and eventually all that’s left is the vertical plane where we truly reside. That’s what’s meant by As Above, So Below..the oneness of the vertical plane where All are One.  Where “herein lies the peace of God”.

To sum up, we are one. We can delude ourselves into thinking this isn’t true, or that it takes time to work out all of our problems so that we can then become one. Actually, the problems we believe we have are actually illusion. The Creator doesn’t even see them. Our wealth, our Fehu is spiritual in nature. It’s our reality that never ceases, no matter how hard we try to forget it. The action in this case, Jera, shows us that time is an illusion and we have only to remember who we are. Time collapses and we move closer to truth. Which brings us to the outcome, Dagaz. It is who we are. We live in the peace of God because we are the peace of God. 

This was a wonderful runecasting today. 

Quotation from A Course In Miracles..

Saturday's Runecast relating to A Course in Miracles

To recap a bit, I began this blog last December. Over the past year or so I've experienced so much drama..and not of my own making. Well, I'm sure I participated, I just didn't cause any of it. So there's that. My landlord evicted us from our commercial space, which also ended our business. We couldn't find a place that was within our budget and given the seasonal nature of our business, we simply didn't feel that we could sign a lease with someone else without knowing how we would pay for it. Neither of us is irresponsible like that, so we took the burden that we're still coping with, both financially and emotionally.

In July, my father died who was also my abuser. Six weeks later, my next door neighbor apparently thought it was just fine and dandy to send his friend over wearing a pistol in plain sight to talk about getting irrigation water on his "crop". I had no idea who that guy was and now we don't speak to the neighbors anymore. If my neighbor had actually done his irrigation over the years, he would know that the properties are sloped in such a way that run off will get on his property. It was why he agreed that we could put a culvert in our driveway so that the run off could irrigate the lower part of his field where water didn't reach. Well, water could get there if they ever re-dug the ditches and actually irrigated that section, but that's another story. So, now I'm the bad guy who apparently needs to be confronted with weapons. Needless to say, now they're allowed only five feet from either side of my ditch and that's it. They're not allowed to be anywhere else on my property, especially at my front door...with a gun.

After my abuser died, his wife began sending me the bills associated with his death. I cut off contact with him over twenty years ago because I had to. The pressure became too great and I wasn't functioning at all. So back to the bills. I've never met this woman. At first, she used her own name in the return address section of the envelope she used. Then, she used his. Time out for a panic attack.. okay..breathing better now. It's as if my abuser is reaching out from the grave to abuse me some more using his wife as proxy. I haven't responded to her. They keep coming.

And then I received a bill from a hospital with my abuser's name on it and my address. She has evidently contacted these places and told them to send the bills to me. I called the hospital while in a panic attack - my heart raced so much I could barely breathe. They were really nice to me and they took care of changing the address back. They won't be bothering me again. Then the helicopter service sent me a bill as well. Another call, another panic attack. They understood as well. I told them everything. I don't go to the mailbox anymore.


I've worked with runes for over thirty years, but not consistently. The same is true for A Course in Miracles. Since losing our business, I've felt compelled to return to the study of both to find my center again. I had no idea all these other things would happen as well. 

Today, I pulled Nauthiz, Fehu, and Ehwaz in a three rune spread. A three rune spread is useful when needing insight on Issue, Action and Outcome. Anymore, that's a daily event for me...

Nauthiz refers to need or necessity. It's the struggle to discern need from desire and the conflict that results when we choose wrongly. The Course would suggest that it's the difference between the ego and our focus on God or source energy. It's living along the horizontal plane instead of the vertical. The Course says that if something isn't of God, it's not real. So in light of the Course, Nauthiz refers to where my focus should now be..away from events caused by man and on the understand that:

Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God.

Fehu, as the action, represents the collective, or in the case of the Course, the sonship. The sonship refers to mankind. Fehu's energy moves us from the pressure to remain with the expectations of the whole to individuality. Fehu also refers to wealth. But wealth doesn't always mean money. Sometimes, as in my case, it refers to something more metaphorical. Abundance can also mean what we give to others. The Course continually brings us back to extension of love and unity as a means of atonement..of bringing the sonship to wholeness, again, living along the vertical rather than the horizontal plane. Fehu also talks about debt or baggage. What do we owe each other as we remember each of us is holy, and an essential part of the sonship? Removing the veil of perception is required so that the individuality Fehu speaks of doesn't make us forget our responsibility to the sonship. If anything, it reinforces that responsibility by illustrating that true freedom and wealth is found in unity with others.

Ehwaz, the outcome, refers to trust and partnership. It's the ultimate outcome of the struggle represented by Fehu. Mastering our reactionary emotions and behavior, and uniting with others is key to a positive outcome. It's also key to our survival, according to the Course. It's understanding that if it's not of God, it's not real, and we can all move past the hurt and the pain and bring about the atonement. We do this by seeing everyone as holy and without error. It involves not judging others, for to do that is to judge ourselves.
 
This runecasting is significant particularly when considering what's happening throughout the world today. It essentially follows the three lines above. Nauthiz becomes..nothing real can be threatened..Fehu becomes..nothing unreal exists..and Ehwaz becomes..herein lies the peace of God. We must understand that the reality is we're all one family. As such, we need each other. As we begin to see this truth as fundamental, the need for separation will will end and compassion will be a given.

And as for me.. my struggle is to see that the past doesn't need to control my present. And that the only person who defines me is me. I'm stronger than I ever believed I could be, because I'm still here. I choose how I define myself. No one else. I survived. And that's everything.


Excerpts from A Course In Miracles, Combined Volume. Foundation For Inner Peace. 2007

Thoughts on A Course In Miracles..

I first discovered A Course In Miracles in the eighties. I have begun the Course many times over the years. I've heard that's not uncommon. It's a "required course" as they say, and once I heard that, I was on board. I'm nothing if not obedient. Well, sometimes.

This time, my husband is also doing the Course with me. If that's not proof that there is no order of difficulty in miracles, I don't know what is. I bought the book for our IPods and we're both listening to it and reading the text.

The thing is, so much has happened in my life that returning to the source is necessary. And that's how I view the Course. It redefines everything back to its original state. It clears up what our role and responsibility is in this world. It says:

                                                 Nothing real can be threatened
                                                 Nothing unreal exists
                                                 Herein lies the peace of God

What this says to me is that if it's not of God, it doesn't exist. It's not about our perceptions or ego. It's about living on the vertical plane, rather than the horizontal plane. The horizontal plane involves perception and ego, as well as time. Miracles collapse time and move us to the vertical plane. We only need to remember what we already know. It's as if we're in a darkened room and all we need to do is open the curtains and let the light in.

The Course tells us that our "natural inheritance" is love, and that love is "all-encompassing".

Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love. The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle. ~ ACIM Ch 1, Sect. 1 Principles of Miracles

And..

Miracles are natural. When they do not occur something has gone wrong. ~ ACIM Ch 1, Sect. 1 Principles of Miracles

Yep, definitely a redefinition of things.. miracles are not a spectacle and should never be viewed as such. They should not be used to create belief in others. They are an exchange of love amongst the sonship. Yes, another redefinition. The sonship refers to humanity as a whole. We can call it anything we want. The Course is Christian in similarity, and although it appears to use traditional Christian terms, it seems like it redefines Christianity in its entirety. I've never identified myself as Christian, so I'm not completely sure about that, but that's how it seems.

I'm going to blog about my journey, so forgive me if something offends..it's certainly not my intention. I believe that although each of us is on our own journey toward consciousness, we cannot do this alone. It's not possible. We're part of a collective consciousness that is so interrelated and interdependent that we simply cannot live without each other. We cause the separation from each other. Our journey is to understand this and embrace each other as family.


Excerpts are from A Course in Miracles, from the Foundation For Inner Peace. 1992.